Talking to Your Kids about School

“How was school today?”

As parents and caregivers, we want to know more about our child’s day. We want to engage with our kids, hear about their interests and challenges, and find out about what they are learning and who their friends are. But for most of us, asking “how was school” at best gets a “fine”, or maybe a noncommittal shrug in response.

Asking open ended but specific questions can encourage your child to talk more, give you a better idea of their day, and even help you to spot some potential challenges they may be having either with their school work or in social situations. Here are 7 great questions to ask that may get more of a response than the usual “fine”:

“What made you laugh today?” Asking them to share a funny story or a joke they heard can help them to open up.

“What was the best part of your day?” Starting out your conversation on a positive note can also help your kids to focus on positive aspects of their day.

“Who did you sit with at lunch/play with at school?” This can give you a good idea of their friend groups and how they are doing with social relationships.

“What was the most interesting thing you learned today?” Pay attention – if they often respond with “nothing” it might indicate that your child isn’t engaged in their learning, or is struggling with some of the lessons.

“What was the hardest thing you had to do today?” This can give you some idea of what is challenging your child, and how they are developing their problem-solving skills both in the classroom and the schoolyard.

“What are you looking forward to tomorrow?” This can either help you know more about what is going on at the school, serve as a reminder for important school events, or give you a heads up that there may be a problem (if they are always saying there is nothing to look forward to).

“What did you need help with today? Who helped you?” Understanding who your child turns to for help at school gives you a better picture of their support network and who they rely on.

These questions can be good conversation starters to help you engage with your child and get a better picture of how they are doing and feeling at school. Keep those lines of communication open!